Crazy Times (LJ)

I haven't posted in a while. I have gone through a MAJOR life change in the past few weeks. One that I had never intended for, but I keep pluggin' away. My weight seems to keep going up and down. I am down under 200, again, and this time I'm not going to be lazy and think that it's okay to back off the healthy eating just because I'm under 200. I'm going to continue to make good choices! One of the meals that I've been making lately is Chicken Salsa Burritos. It's super simple! And it's healthy, especially when I forgo the tortillas and put it on salad instead. Here's the recipe:

1 lb. chicken (I use chick. thighs, but you can use whatever type of boneless chick. you prefer)

16oz. fresh salsa

1 can black beans

3/4 cup corn

All you do is place all ingredients into the Crock Pot, cook on low heat for 6-8 hours and it's done. About a 1/2 hour before I take it out, separate the chicken with two forks to make it a shredded chicken.

Next, either put the mixture on tortillas or top a salad with it. It's so simple and my kids love it, too. You know it's a good meal if everyone in the family likes it and asks for more. Ha!

ugh

So, this past week a close family friend passed away so I have lost all control and have eaten like crazy. And sadly it shows with a two pound gain. I am such an emotional eater and I absolutely hate it. I do not know how to break that cycle and I do not know how to find balance in my life. I really need it. I feel burned out on all ends. I do not know how to bring the focus back on myself. I do not know how to make myself a priority. I do not think that my motivation is strong enough to put in the hardwork that it needs to take to lose the weight. I keep setting the alarm early to do exercises, but then I turn it off. I have the intention of bringing healthy food to work, but then I eat out. I am just at the end of my rope.
This morning, I got up and did my exercise video and the kids were climbing all over me and getting into trouble, so I had to stop it before the end to take care of them. The kicker is that it was my husbands day off and he just laid in bed (wide awake) and did nothing. Yet, he is the first to complain that I have not lost the baby weight. I hate this.

SOOOO LONG

It has been so long, WAY too long, since I posted on here. I am trying really hard to stick with my diet, but I am under a lot of stress and right now and am only doing so so. I have totally fallen off the wagon with the no soda and have been very sporadic with exercise.
I read a success story on the weight watchers website that struck a chord with me. The woman said that a friend of hers had gone through a divorce and then lost a gigantic amount of weight. The woman thought to herself that this was the best revenge. Then she got thinking to herself, "I am in a good relationship. Why not do this for myself and my husband now." It struck a chord with me, because I have thought this a hundred times. My relationship with my husband has been very rocky for a little over a year now and is a major contributor to the weight that I have put on. I got thinking to myself why wait until my marriage falls apart to try to be healthy and happy. I am not sure where my marriage is going to end up, but my health and my body is not going to be a victim any longer. I am recommitting myself to this process, to weight loss, to no soda and to you LJ. I love you dearly girl. We can do this. ALL of this!!